Post IVF Twins: Recti Divarication and Unexpected Pregnancy!

 If you are not losing your pregnancy weight, it might be because you are still pregnant!

My birthday present, which she assures me is mine.

The first time we were intimate since giving birth was when the twins were 6.5 months old. They'd only been breastfed for the first 6 months. She should have kept pumping...

Imagine, 4th Nov 2020, my wife and I are discussing the American presidential election, suddenly she feels a flutter in her abdomen. Her stomach growling? But she just ate. A familiar sensation. Like a kick.

And she texts me:

Palpitations and cold sweat

No, it can't be! We're supposed to be infertile. We've only just got the hang of handling the twins. Our F.I.R.E. plans. Why is the world so cruel to us!

Well, it would seem the KKH fertility treatment was more than we bargained for, because my birthday was spent rushing to get O&G appointments and referrals.  She hadn't had her period since she became pregnant but I assumed that was just normal irregularity with the menses post pregnancy. After years of struggling with fertility, having to use contraception never crossed my mind. It also never occurred to me that we could possibly have another child without an IVF cycle.

Not going to lie, this was not ideal. Wife is at a crucial point in her career. Our babies are not easy babies, still so young, not sleeping through the night, and now we are about to be outnumbered! Flirted with the idea of termination of pregnancy.

But at the first gynae appointment, I saw my son (it's a boy!) wave his hand. Suddenly, expecting a third kid's not too bad. It can't be that hard right?

Well, it certainly isn't easy. By the time we realised we were expecting, it was already about 21 weeks. It was a mad rush to get all the screening tests done before week 24, the legal cut off for termination. Thankfully the NIPT (non invasive pregnancy test) did not detect any elevated risk of abnormalities. Growth scans were on track and he looks healthy.

Thinking we would likely stop at two, we had begun giving away our baby clothes, pumps, car seats etc, to friends and cousin who were expecting. Our baby expenses likely eclipse theirs, so they very willingly returned them when we shamelessly asked. 

Our twins can't graduate to toddler beds yet, tossing and turning and trying to escape when we put them to bed. That means a third crib, decided not to get a cheap Ikea crib and mattress as it would be unfair to didi, but holy cow Hatchery Cribs raised the babyletto crib prices by like a 100 bucks (or 4 cans of milk powder) since we last bought them in 2019. We got our old infant car seat back, but the problem is my beat up Honda Jazz is way to small to fit all 3 car seats

With the third and most definitely final F.I.R.E. extinguisher, we've resigned ourselves to the fact that we'll be like working into our 50s/ 60s. Thankfully middle class so finances aren't really a source of concern. Would have been nice lying on the beach at St Regis Bali with drink in hand and retired in our 40s though.

Are you reading this SAF? I've done my duty, 2 sons to replace me, they should shorten my NS obligations. Just kidding, I love ICT too much.

So how the heck did we, 2 doctors, not realise that my wife was pregnant? Wouldn't she be showing?

Well, divarication recti, and the fact that she keeps eating chocolates. Post pregnancy, my wife did not get back her figure due to a weakening of her abdominal muscles, a sort of splitting at the seams in the midline. This is rather common post pregnancy especially with twins. Takes alot of room to raise twins, inside and outside the womb. So she ended up with a sort of lower abdominal bulge. At one time it looked like it was getting smaller then later it just sort of came back. I thought it was just a lack of exercise. Now we know it's because didi was kicking it open.

When your wife looks like she's getting abit more... hefty, the smart man knows to keep his mouth shut. Apparently everyone thought the same thing because when we announced the 3rd kid, suddenly everyone said they thought she was just getting fatter. 

It bothers her quite abit, says she can't wear bikinis with her divarication recti. Not that she wore them last time. Anyway she decided to go see a physiotherapist to work on strengthening her transversus abdominis muscles. She also got an app (part of a package with the PT she went to) and has been following the programme dutifully.

Another problem with such a short interval between the kids is the risk of uterine rupture with vaginal birth after Cesarean. The scar tissue post her Cesarean section may not have the tensile strength to keep it all together. She still wants to try a vaginal delivery, so she has to start doing some strengthening exercises now.

For more pregnancy chronicles and parenthood slice of life, follow me!